Saturday 12 April 2014

Relationship Zone: He “Ain’t Shit”…but Is It Your Fault?


You ain't shit, never was shit, ain't gone be shit, and ya Momma ain't shit. Now what?"
Some people feel that the difference between a real man and an "Ain't shit" guy has absolutely nothing to do with a woman. Kinda true but...Newsflash: EVERY man has the potential to be both and there's something to be said about the role a woman plays in what she's presented. For instance:
When you go to the club, I bet you wear something a little sexy, you accept a few drinks, and you jirate the night away without a worry in the world. Right? But...if you're in an interview for an office job, you're probably not singing at the top of your lungs, in a 3 point stance, dropping it like it's hot. What changed? Was it your character, your morals, or your home training? No. It was your environment, your surroundings, and the people around you in which you were intending to make an impression on. So this same principal applies to men. Remember, men are RE-actors. Working out is a reaction to women liking muscles, having a job is a reaction to women liking money, and wearing condoms is a reaction to STDs and surprise babies.
So what does that mean for you? If you've attracted yourself a real man, one that has intentions on pursuing marriage and a family with the next woman he encounters, you cancompletely ruin that by disrespecting him or even worse yourself. He can be up for the Nobel Peace Prize but that won't keep him from bringing out the worst in him should you beckon for it with unnecessary stress.


"ALL HE WANTED WAS SEX...JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER GUY"
Real men catch hell on this one. How convenient it would be if we could detach our penises and put it in a safe until the time was right, but guess what, we don't work like that.The problem is, when women sift through to the good men, they think our hormones are on ice waiting for us to make our mind up about who we're going to marry, which is the case approximately 0.034% of the time(according to a recent study). You see, physical arousal is a God-given element of being human and an involuntary response to being attracted to someone. So yeah, real men like love sex too and it's not fair for you to hold that against us.  But if that's the only way you're making yourself valuable to us, we will accept it with a smile, and leave shortly thereafter it gets old much like the trademark of the "ain't shit" guy. You will go on to deem us as being just like the others you've dealt with, only telling the world the one-sided truth(which is a lie) about how we only wanted sex. But you want to know the common denominator in your ratio of a-holes to great guys? YOU. Address that part of the equation, and you will have a better chance of changing what it equals to.
"BUT A REAL MAN WILL SHOW A WOMAN THAT ALL GUYS AREN'T THE SAME"



So, you want me to go on about how a real man treats every woman like a queen? He kisses your feet, rubs your ears, does all the cooking, and even when you do look fat, he tells you that he loves your curves.... Ok, we'll go with that. But even the cutest little kitten will attack like a lion if you rub it wrong. Your only job is to keep a man true to his identity. If he's an "ain't shit" guy, be the kind of self-respecting, strong, classy woman that repels him. Not the kind that makes him feel right at home(rolling his weed, playing Xbox with him when you know he's supposed to be looking for a job, accepting his disrespect). No, that doesn't mean holding your vagina as collateral until he makes it official, because if he has no loyalty, then his relationship title will remain Single no matter what you call it. He'll wait out your 90 day rule while he sleeps with your best friend and uses your tax refund to pay for the baby shower.




If he's a real man, be that environment that's conducive to that. Stroke his ego every now and then(it's OK), let him know you got his back, and always hold him accountable for meaning what he says and vice versa. Just like a real woman, a real man knows his worth and he's not about to waste any of it on a girl who's showing she doesn't know a good thing when it's in front of her. The cape is getting less and less popular the more modern day independent women show themselves, so don't expect some "Man of Steel" to come saving you from all of the bad habits you've held onto over the years while you play victim like you owe him that responsibility. "Ain't shit" guys are out there, but instead of trying to avoid them, focus on being the one they try to avoid.
-Derrickjaxn.com

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